utopia, 19 september 2026

Finally, my ticket

Found this email in my spam folder this morning. It was from 'SUPREME COUNCIL' and titled 'Elite Membership Invitation,' and I reproduce it here in its entirety (except for the one redaction at the end). I have also kept its punctuation, capitalization, syntax and spelling oddities intact ... I don't want to fill the thing with [sic]s, so please be aware that those are not MY unedited errors.

Are you interested in becoming part of our Elite Illuminati brotherhood organization offering unique opportunities for personal advancement, networking, and financial benefits amongst others?

The Illuminati Brotherhood invites selected individuals to learn more about its membership and initiation program. As part of the stated membership benefits, a financial benefit of $10,000,000.00 is given to eligible new members.

A new member is also entitled to numerious Additional benefits and opportunities following successful initiation. Contrary to many rumors and misconceptions, we do not engage in blood sacrifices, human sacrifices, or any harmful practices. Instead, we have are an organization that focuses on support, development, charitable values and preserving the human species.

For further information regarding membership requirements, and the benefits associated with membership, please contact Grand master of the 3rd veil via WhatsApp at: [telephone number in Greece].

Please treat this invitation as confidential.

19 September 2026